Who says you can't convert an aluminum mountain bike with vertical dropouts? Not this suicide biker. I'm sure the double straps were chosen for comfort (or style). The marginal increase in reliability conferred when using your foot-retention for quick stops would clearly affect your suicide biker cred.

Irony is cool. The irony of wearing a skateboard helmet while riding a "track" bike with an inch of slack in the chain was not lost on me.